Wednesday, March 31, 2004

I really hope this isnt real(nothing scary in the ghost way, enter in peace)
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dear girls,
sorry about my absence....
Ive been checking the blog on a regular basis, just felt like keeping quiet for abit haha...
so anyway, here're my updates...
The Stockholm trip was great! I went with Ester (prolly one of my closer friend now. She is a Taiwanese from Toronto. A very cool and pretty chick! She is doing graphic design and she's a makeup artist as well)... and Nori (feisty little sweet girl from sg that resembles bjork ?, she's doing illustration.) We had a great time...no tension or arguments!

We stayed on this floating hostel(a ship) docked on a partially frozen river thats somewhat the center of Stockholm. (think singapore river...)
Spent most of our time just getting lost in the city, checking out bookshops( children's storybk illustration etc) digging in on meatballs and other yummilicious swedish food(we made sure we had one good meal a day) scouring second hand thrift shops, interior shops and just chilling!
Sweden is just lovely.... very laid back, surrounded by water.. Extremely picturesque! (think the little match girl for the city and heidi for the country) The Swedish are extremely sweet and family orientated! I prolly post some pics up when im not lazy...

Got back and the lovely Singaporean girls in my hostel treated me to some tasty homemade chicken rice! gosh it was soooooo goood! just like the real thing!!!!

Today, we(ester, me, nori, cammi(this english french girl), brought ester's friends (they are visiting from st Francisco) down to Brighton.
Brighton is just fantastic...its everything I needed. The sun, cool weather and a fantastic ocean. It reminded me a great deal of my trip to perth actually! Ester?s friends are fab so it was really nice hanging out with them. We did loads of cheesy tourist-y crap like having bad fish and chips by the pier and tea & cream in a nice little B&B style cafe. Spend the rest of the day walking ard and doing tons of window shopping....def an enjoyable excursion.:D

Im going to meet up with ted(weicong's friend) tomorrow... and candice as well. think i'll be going down for the Glastonbury fest with her in june. cant wait!

Other stufff that are happening to me

i'll prolly be getting a job.....in ester's work place? a sock shop or my school lib...but im abit afraid cos coming sept would be my final year. For my 3d year i'll have a 15k word thesis to write and a major project to handle. On the other hand, i wold reallly love to travel as much as i can when im here...so that's abit of a dilema for me...
plus?.I was talking to my lect the other day and he was telling me that i should consider doing my masters.... very psyched upon hearing that! But there will be so much work for me to be done and i've to start NOW....told my mum about it and she is totally cool and supportive about it too...
Not thinking of the financial side of things, i will probably just give it a shot first?.and try to get a grand later?.... so right now ive to really reconsider my priorities and have a 2 yr plan....

Okie ... gonnna to do more catching up on the blog first and post another entry later?.


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Tuesday, March 30, 2004

Fanni dear, oh my god! I LOVE Pink Floyd!!! They are my favouritest band! Do you like them too?? Haha, I know it's totally off the main issue of concern for the moment...
Haha, gayle, gayle, now I know who you are talking about. I actually had my suspicions....heh. I see in the pic that your hair's longer. Are you growing your hair long now? I would love to see you with long hair when I go back to Singapore in a couple of months.
Shihui darling,
I know how it feels like to feel lonely. It's definitely understandable that you aren't able to study for your tests for when one is depressed, one loses interest in everything that used to matter to them. Tests are only significant to a certain extent... How about try doing something active that can take your mind off things for a bit like swimming...or shopping. I swear shopping is really therapeutic....at least for me.

All my lovelies,
I am eternally grateful to each and everyone of you for sharing your thoughts and providing such wise and insightful analyses! Thank you very much for your concern and most important of all, for being there for me. It makes me think of you guys more so now and I am on the verge of tears for I realize how much I miss being with all of you. Please take good care of yourselves!

Vi amo,
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my lovely jerri,

Don’t be so down. I know its tough and you feel kind of bummed about yourself but you gotta keep picking yourself up and keep going.

We have all watched enough kungfu movies to know that the uber-powerful hero always walks into his first battle as an underdog. He takes all the crap-talk and bashes the heck out of them later on in the movie. This anology applies to you apptly in a way, coz when underdog is training prior the battle, he has to go through shit, often alone. Some decisions, though painful, are necessary. For instance, i secretly admire you too, your independence of living alone (no nagging from the folks at home), as very much I would love to go back to school. Living again in OZ land, where baking means so much fun.

As for being a hermit, im too very much like one too on weekdays. Often, to tired and restless to go anywhere on weekdays. Been busy with freelance projects. But somehow the work / pay ratio is seriously skewed for me. My last project saw me redoing someone else’s work and having to share the very small paycheck. I put an inordinate amount of time into my projects, even troubleshooting problems the client is not aware of. I guess from monday to friday, when's there's work, there is just pain in the arse.

You're not alone girl, we are your air bags cum "emmotional retirement fund".
P.s (Think its a good idea that when we all turned olf and grey, lets shift into a retirement home together as neighbours).

Keep smiling my dear girl, because we do miss and love you alot too.

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Dearest Qinya...

I do agree with the gals that dara is just plain ol' drama queen. I guess you should try to distance yourself from her. Like all friendships, its takes 2 persons to cultivate, and , if Dara "stands you up" all the time, and being a total bitch, I think there is nothing you could do much after talking to her. Maybe, Dara should seek professional counselling...

So sweetie, cheer up... It sucks to have your friend turn away from you for no apprent reasons. Perhaps, sometimes, things are just meant to be that way. If Dara doesn't respect you as a friend, you just may have to be more like Pink Floyd.

In Pink Floyd's words, "I've become comfortably numb. Like I've stood still way too long, and now there are pins and needles in my legs and I just can't move. All I'm doing is hang on till the sensation has faded away, and try to shift my feet again."

Hope everything's wonderful where you are and I know it is.
We still miss you and love you lots

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Shihui! Cheer up!! I know it is hard not having anyone around you, especially in times like this. Getting yourself immersed in school work is not the solution either..sigh..what can I say? Time will pass by quickly and the semester will just fly past before you actually feel it! It goes the same for me. My life is very monotonous now, everyday is just gym, work, home and sleep for me. Not forgetting that I have to work almost 6 days a week and attend functions on top of that. In fact, I don't contact anyone during the weekday at all, I just hide in my shell and hibernate the working week away. This is really bad, but I don't have the energy and mood to do anything during the week. All I want is just time for myself, and more leisure time to do activities that I like!

p.s- And looking forward to frequent updates on the blog!

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Dear Qingya,

The certain someone was once close to you in college. I don't know her very well personally, but had hung out with her a couple of times over the past year. Haha, I'm sure by now you would have guessed who that certain someone is :)

Well I really hope things get better between you and Dara. I would hate to get stuck in this kind of situation..It would put me in misery and I can understand how it can fuck up your mood etc. Take it easy dear, I'm sure there will be a way to work things out!


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My dear Stella Artois, you made really good points but I actually have already been openminded enough to see all that in the past 3 years and have really been there for her. I think I've been sympathetic enough towards Dara don't you think? Just imagine me hanging out with you guys and after like 20 mins, I say "I don't like this, I have to go, I have to go" (looking pissed off with the world)...and doing this practically EVERYTIME for about 3 years. It is cumulative and has really taken a toll on me. I get depressed and moody more often than not...it's very infectious. I have been very sympathetic and have been trying to help her all this time, but I think it's about time that she learns to help herself. Btw, I was laughing my ass off when you said that you would throw hair dye. You are just too funny! Haha.
My dear Gayle,
So who does Dara remind you of from college? I am most certainly interested to know! You look great in the picture from the "elevation party" whatever that is...
My dear Angie,
Thank you, I definitely do hope that things will eventually get better between Dara and I...
My dear Shihui,
I just read your comment....Now that I've been more annoyed about the whole Dara situation than clearheaded, I really appreciate your opinion. Si si, I will try not to make her problem mine. I guess I'm just way too affected...haha.
Missing you all ever so much,
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dearest girlfriends,

i am in such a state now... i don't even know how to explain. i feel like a hermit. i miss spending time with friends. i miss having friends around me. it's depressing. you can't possibly imagine how alone i feel. it's like my support structure is non-existent. i miss you girls. i've got 2 tests later in the day and i can't be buggered to study. i simply haven't the mood.

anyway, dear qingya, don't get too depressed about dara alright? yes, i agree with gayle. she sounds neurotic and insecure. she's prob so used to being like that that she doesn't know how to deal with such a confrontation. she's just trying to find a way out and blaming it on you. perhaps it is best that she moves out, so you can have your peace and she can have time to think about the whole situation and realise how much you have been there for her and that she does have a problem. but keep in mind this is not a problem that will go away overnight. Let her be and know that you have done yoru part as a friend and if possible, be there for her when she needs you but don't make her problem your problem. i'm sure you have enough on your mind. sometimes i feel the most help you can be to a friend in such a situation is to throw them in the ocean and let them learn to swim on their own, not literally of course. and do take into account that i think she is trying. i really think so. the fact that after hanging up on you, you guys actually managed to spend almost the entire day together and having fun. she's still lapsing into her old habits but i think she's trying! don't fret, dear, all of us here all love you and know you did what you had to do and we appreciate you.

stel: i think that's a pretty cool idea. then as the years go on, we can have mire and more volumes....hahaha....we'll feel so stupid reading back at the entries 10 years down the road

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i is so hot >:(

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Hello, I'm at work and feeling dreadfully sleepy. Was admiring the plush leather yellow sofa outside the office and wished that I could lie on top of it and sleep my fatigue away.
Not to mention that I'm having a splitting headache from the heat! The droning of faint voices combined with gurgling noises from the photocopiers are my lullabies. ..........

lazy G

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I think on the 5th year anniversary of this blog we should pool our money and publish our favourite entries into a diary book! Im thinking we should call it "Letters to my Girlfriends" by Stella, Gayle, Angie, Mich, Fanni and Qingya haha. My corny title is sorta inspired by how we all start each blog with Dear Girls, etcetc, and we sign off with our names at the end, just as if we were writing real letters. We'll stuff the book with lots of memorable photos and our handwritings, woo, wouldnt that be something to show the grandkids!

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Ok i think it just proves a point that one shouldnt ever move in with friends! of course, unless we're all unmarried and 60 then we can all buy a aunty club house together. Quarrel worse come to worse i throw my hair dye at you.

Anyway my opinion is that some distance is best, with ANYONE, be it family or boyfriend or true friends. Having said that she was just probably at her worst with you because you guys were so close (physically and emotionally). Her party pooperness was prolly just a way she tries to call for help, attention and reassurance but done too much it sorta backfired on her? Its especially trying when she's around people who HATE to reassure others constantly.

I guess she's one of those people who is more tiring than others, eventually she'll have to learn to adjust or she'll drive everyone away. There is someone out there for everyone unperfect...perhaps you guys just rub each other the wrong way? You're P-Offed now but maybe it'll help to think she wasnt putting on a show or anything, no matter how trivial or inconsiderate, i think the fact is that she TRULY TRULY feels miserable and i guess i can try my best to be sympathetic to that.

Whatever it is, no matter whos right or wrong i just think its tres sad a friendship has to end this way, after so many mostly-happy years. Afterall she was a huge part of your life in America..

GAYLE i immediately got who you were talking about!!! hahha. :)
Angel, i think you are really so mature n adult now!i really admire how you became such a positive person despite all the shit u had to go thru in recent years. im so glad we're all here to watch each other through everything that happens.


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Dearest Qingya,
I truly think Dara is crazy! She strikes me as totally insecure and suffering from low self esteem. I can understand if she gets into sudden lapses of moodswings and starts throwing tantrums sometimes, but I cannot tolerate the fact that she does it almost every time you guys are out. It is absolutely annoying and inconsiderate! I don't know what drove her to this extent; it might be an unhappy childhood or traumatic family experience..oh well I won't bother to make a guess, just leave it to the experts! However, this is all very sad, and it probably feels like losing someone that was so important in your life. Theres nothing you can really do about it! Leave her to be at the moment, I think you have tried hard enough to salvage the situation. Don't be sad Qingya, at least you know we are always here for you.

p.s- I think Dara reminds me of a certain someone from college, but worse.


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oke, jus fyi.....
it took me almost a whole working day tryin to post my previous blog....the 1st time the stoopid comp hanged n my bolg disappeared cos i din save it TMD!!!! so pissed...
i was contemplating whether or not to write another one.....n finally i did....so there

sorrie qingya....din realli comment on ur blog cos i din see it till i posted mine.....but i hope dat things will get better between the 2 of you......u never know, she might change! heh

oh ya one last thing, i might be goin away to jakarta from 9th-14th.....long deserved break...let me know if anyone wans me to buy stuff for'em oke.....

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okeee...these pics prove once n for all dat i need to lose some serious weight....and no gayle, u do not look the least bit intoxicated.....me n gayle have been constantly emailing each other @work.....since currently we are the onli sorrie arses serving confinement in cubicles.....sob sob..

i havent been bloggin for awhile.....but i do still read past blogs by u girlies......and i burst out laughing readin stels "how did we get old so fast"....and i tink fanni is scratching her head figuring out wat garzes n berries were...poor thing....
but dun worry la.....it was nothing glamourous to write home about!!

but aside from dat......stel's right about dat bein the sweetest times of our lives.....we were prolly too engrossed and full of ourselves n the problems we TOT we had, dat we were blinded from seeing the true beauty n sweetness n simplicity surrounding our lives. Seriously, wat did we hav to worry bout besides passing exams n doin HW?? worry bout not bein cool enuff...worry bout ppl bitching bout us...worry bout the crush u barely know hangin out wit a girl u cant stand????
i can clearly see now dat we realli do create our own problems, it was never an issue till we make it an issue....
so it is true dat we have a choice...hmmmm

anyhows...., tis too late to be lamenting over sweet days gone by....i guess the lesson to be learnt from here is to always cherish wat we have in our lives this very second, seize the moment cos we will never hav another one like it. dun keep focusing on the problems u hav, deal wit it effectively if u can, but if its outta ur reach, jus let time take care of it. i know everyone's got their own problems, n will never go away unless someting is done, but dun let dat take over ur life, n remember to stop n see the good side of things. must remember dat we hav each other...to help along the way wen it gets too hard...we share sweet memories, bad ones & esp embaressing ones!!!...i know dat i've been suffering from partial memory loss...but im thankful I have u girls to remind me of past events I have long sent to exile =)

in a few yrs time we'd hav a different set of problems to tackle with: bein married...juggling kids n work...struggling financially to make ends meet....deteriorating physical/mental health....bills bills bills.....in laws....committing adultry..??!
heh....but seriously la, lets not all wait till then to realise wat good times we are having now oke...if not, we'd onli be goin thru another vicious cycle. Pause for a moment to reflect on life, its too short to have any regrets.

love yourself, love the life you live!

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Monday, March 29, 2004

My everdearest friends,
Things have gone awry with Dara and I. Henrik, wenny and my family know the story. And I just wrote to Kai about it. So I shall copy and paste it here for it's a really long story and I am too upset and weary to write anymore. Please read this:
Well, things between Dara and I really hadn't been that good. It's mainly her and her problems. And I think I have been tolerant enough for way longer than most people would have been. I mean she's still the same old Dara that I know since freshman year, but I never did hang out with her that much in the past. Hence, I was much more tolerable of her. Certain things about her would always bother me but I could just brush it aside easier. But hey, no one is perfect and everyone has their own imperfections and idiosyncrasies...but sometimes, some things are just harder to accept. Dara is always so OVERsensitive, overparanoid and overemotional. She always overanalyzes things to such an extent that she usually blow things up to vast proportions and end up distorting alot of truths and facts.
Bene, here's how the story goes. Like I told you before, I decided to confront her last friday to talk things through because I think I've held my feelings long enough and besides, I always think that friends should always share and not be hypocritical. So anyway, the subject of confrontation is that I find that she is always such a killjoy. Since, I have known her 3 years back, she's always the wetblanket or partypooper. It's definitely ok to be like this sometimes and I most certainly think she should show her true emotions. But sometimes, it just gets TOO much and it always ends up affecting everyone else around her...many of our mutual friends find that truly annoying. It's like we will all be happy and go out to have fun and she will get moody, depressed and emotional and say, "I don't like this, I have to go, I have to go" (in a bitter tone). Or she will go, "I can't deal, I have to go!" Sometimes, a group of us just arrived at a party and she was ok at first, then she would immediately look bitter and says she has to leave! Ok, if it happens a couple of times, it's fine. But she does this almost ALL the times we hang out. Can you imagine her doing this all the time for 3 years that we've hung out...it's starting to take a toll on me especially since we started living together and in the same little room. It doesn't matter where we go or what we do...she just has to leave...it's like what the fuck? I think everyone is an escapist in a way, and I am definitely a big escapist in a sense. But Dara just chooses to escape from everything possible. She just does not want to deal with people, things or her problems and keeps avoiding everything.
So anyway, I talked to her about it calmly and she said she appreciates me being truthful and the next minute she's like, "I guess us living together is not good, I am moving out." I'm like er ok, but the main point is not about us living together. Anyway, we didn't quite talk for a week and I called her on Saturday and she goes, "we have to talk" and I'm like ok. So she started accusing me of picking Henrik over her! I was like woaa, slow down there buddy, where did that come from?! And she said when I talked to her on Friday, I mentioned that Henrik had suggested to me that maybe she should take out more loans (cos she doesn't really have the money and I would feel bad if she had to sublet a place. On top of that, she also has to pay for the previous place that she moved out from before coming to my place because she didn't like her roomates who are typical fake, dramatic americans. But it took her like 3 years to realize that since she has been good friends with them for 3 years). Anyway, I was like "what the fuck?!". Henrik only mentions that because I said I would feel bad about her moving out and he was only trying to help by coming up with suggestions. So basically, Dara is saying that I am letting my judgement of her to be affected by henrik. She thinks henrik wants her to move out and is inciting me (they were actually friends before...but they are not talking now. Well, dara has problems with people). I totally did not see that coming for #1, this whole thing is about her and our friendship, so what has that gotta do with henrik. #2, this whole thing is about her and her problems and me not being able to deal anymore, not about her moving out. Sigh...kai, kai. I am so confused and perplexed right now. And then, she threw me off again by saying that she doesn't think she can trust me anymore! And I was like what? It really hurt me. Again, I didn't know where that came from. So first she tells me she is glad that I told her about my annoyance with certain idiosyncrasies or hers, then she thinks that I don't like her and am judging her. Again, I think she is oversensitive and is taking things TOO personally. All I did was to point out a few things ABOUT her as a matter of fact, but that doesn't make me love her less. Come on, I'm sure there are things about me she would find annoying too. So she thinks she can't trust me anymore and I was like what the fuck are u talking about. And she said her infamous line, "I can't deal, I have go" And she hangs up on me!! Now, I am the one who can't deal, so I called her and of course she had her cellphone turned off u know, to escape. So I left her 2 messages, yelling at her to grow up and talk things over instead of putting the blame on the world and everyone else. She calls back and we kinda talked things through. We decided to meet up the next day and just hang out.
So I met up with her yesterday and it was actually pretty pleasant hanging out. The weather was nice, we were happy, went to oakdale mall. And at 5pm, she said we should eat dinner out somewhere. But since I thought it was still early, we went to TJ Max first and decided that we would go eat at 6pm. And at 6 as we were walking to my car, she looked moody (again for the godzillionth time) and suddenly said, "Em, I don't feel like eating out anymore, I want to go home". What the fuck? Again, a partypooper and I became moody too. I feel like she can be inconsiderate towards other people's feelings. And she thinks the whole world is against her and bitterly hates the world and people for "causing" her such miseries in life. Em, I think she has to mature and understand that one has to create opportunities for oneself and happiness is something that one has to work for. So I drove her back. It was a silent and uncomfy ride...

My girls, please share your thoughts. I need that...thanx so much.
Miss u all,

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Sunday, March 28, 2004

elevation party: so happy to get let out of my cell!
check out pic 3, angie n fanni are doing the boogiewoogie heheh.

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Thursday, March 25, 2004

i've been trying to sleep earlier and wake up earlier and do work in the morning cos i never get work done at night now cos i get back 8 or 9 from class tired and unable to study. but i doubt i can sleep early tonight. classmate made me a potent cup of coffee during the lecture break in the evening just now. (as i am typing here, i can hear some of my nieghbours or someone on the street having sex.....gross) we went to the post grad tea room for the business sch and make ourselves some free coffee though we're not actually allowed cos we're not from business sch but they can't really tell...and when we got there, they just finished some little celebration and had cakes and piza leftovers and like the greedy people we were, we helped ourselves to them and gobbled the food down, esp the guys (which is basically the whole class considering there are only 2 girls in it).

i can't take pictures of the cat, i have no digicam. oh well, life of a poor student. i'm waiting for someone to give me one.

who are the kiwi boys?

actually, working at the esplanade sounds like fun. it is at least a nice environment to work in. but careful of bitcy patrons. did you read the papers about the bobby mcferrin concert when late comers weren't let in till an hour later and how some got agitated and almost physical? but the training sounds like a drag but you'll prob get to meet new people. look on the bright side, at least you won't be expected to sing like in american idol.

maybe i should try and get some work done now since i'm nowhere near falling asleep esp with ben snoring behind me now.
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Wednesday, March 24, 2004


fann: i have a good friend working at esplanade too! it sounds fun cos she only signs up for shows that she wants to see..haha!

cant wait for elevation party, heard from that same friend (who will be at the party too, fann u can go ask the scoop from her) that its being promoted on radio all the time. hope the mambo kids stay at home!

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Tuesday, March 23, 2004


Jerri, take more pictures of the lovely cats for us to see...
(Stella, angie and gayle) Elevation party is set right? Let's rock down the stars in the night. Oh.. Gayle, nicole is going too. Yes, will bring on the Kiwi boys too.. :)

Something to tell you guys. Someone referred me to work as usher in here. Thinking of it, i then realised that, when iw as little, i thought that being a usher is such a noble thing. The bility to navigate the crowd in the dark, make people happy... and get to watch free shows.

Now, its somewhat something i guess i will have to take it up for the time being until, i get a full time gig somewhere. Sigh!These are going to be "lean years" as a poor struggling writer. I guess, i do what it takes to pursue my dream career.

As you people do know that customer service sucks big time in sg, the usher training is compulsory - it will take place over 7 evenings. And I get paid, $8 per hour subject to CPF (minimum call is 3 hours each time). But, dun think i'll be paid for the training.The funniest thing, there are also many grads who applied for this part time thingy. And yes, i have a interview with the usher on 1st April. (next thursday). Can you imagine that? Keep you guys posted again on the outcome.

P.s( I'm imaging that during the interview, i will be like one of the American idol participants being snobbed by 3 judges)
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finally......it's great you finished it.... now you can go party and relax and shop and have fun.....

my computer hates me. i think it's taking revenge on me because i reformatted it. it's refusing to accept my video card drivers and driving me nuts. spend ages on it and sacrificing my studying time for it. i'm so gonna fail next week

good news is that i've managed to seduce another cat into my house...hahaha...thisn one's all black and with yellow eyes. she's so pretty and is quite a large cat. i carried her and she's really heavy for a cat but not fat. i named her 'Flea'
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girlsssss the thesis is DONE and i slept 16 hrs after i handed it up! fell aslp in my jeans and makeup some more.....

i realli wanna go to the elevation party this weekend! its going to b on the rooftop of shaw tower and partying under the stars, high up in the sky always sounds good to me...

its going to be groovy, lineup includes jassanova, funky lowlives etc. v rare a good jazz party comes to town. we must gooo.

presale tix at 25 bucks, at the door 35 bucks! quiccck sms me i'll go get us tickets asap!!!


Fanni: Monster was great, i cried shitloads. EVERYONE GO CHECK OUT THAI FILM MY GIRL! its sooo sweet n nostalgic of our own childhoods with zero-point , playing cooking, father mother and whatnot. Superbly funny. it reminded me of paultan and i and stacy when we were kids.

Gayle: Letss goo parrtteee. i huggg youu.

Angieee: Guy says contact him again when bunnies are ready. When?

Jerricah: I love cleaningggg rooms.

ALL: I miss u girls, been bz like shit , now its a bit better... plus i just caught 20-30-40 finally! the two young girls are too pretttty! i spent the whole show mesmerized by their prettiness and clothes.


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Monday, March 22, 2004

hey there, girls.

i am sooo bogged down with work. i'mgot 2 tests next week which i've not even halfway through studying for, got group assignments due. individual assignments blah blah... and it's been freakin hot these few days. and i'm beginging to feel strangled. i need to get out and find my own friends to hang out. i need to have my own life. nowadays i just go to sch and come home and study or do homework. i need something to do. something fun, something i enjoy. something out of the house. basically i'm BORED. but i haven't the time or money to dedicate to anything. my house is a mess. really huge mess but i haven't the time or energy or mood to clean up. i wanna go out and party too.... maybe it's just the heat driving me nuts. it went up to 41.4 degrees today. the air is so thick and hot and i was in sch the whole day....

i'm gonna clean up my room, by hook or by crook tomorrow if not i'll just keep feeling crowded. not sure if it'll help cos my computer is opened up now cos i've been trying to figure out what wrong with it. don't think all the wires and transistors exposed will ease the look of my room.

wish me luck

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Sunday, March 21, 2004

Hello beauties....

Keep blogging the happenings around you guys kay...
Angie, Stella, Gayle.. Let's go to party one of these days. Let's have fun and go dancing.. Yes, where are the rest of the girls?? Common, dun be lazy girls. Fill us up with the goss

Anyway, I’ve just got back watching “Monster”. It was great show. If you guys really read the news and folllowing on what’s going on. You will suspect that the movie was a FICTIONALISED AILEEN WURONOS. Who she was and what happened was changed to make the audience sympathetic to her. But the REAL Aileen Wuernos killed all the men cold blood.There was no evidence of abuse and she confessed, with nothing to lose, that they never abused her.

The real Aileen was a cold blooded killer with no respect for human life and she was executed for her crimes. Don't confuse that with "movie Aileen" played by Charlize Theron. It would be like comparing TV series Batman with movie Batman.

However, throughout the show, I could see somewhat the little “Aileen Wuornos” in me. I remembered she said something like that in the movie. Disclaimer: Not that I will go around and killing people, but the fact the intensity love relationship with her girlfriend really make my heart wringe. (Note: I’m not attracted to girls). But, those lines she spoke to girlfriend, thou Christina Ricci had the authorities decked their phone conversation in the last part of the movie

Aileen Wuornos said this at the end of the movie;
"Love conquers all...Every cloud has a silver lining, faith can move mountains, love will always find a way, all you need is love, and everything happens for a reason, where there's love, there's hope…

Oh, well… Or I just relate to those quotes a little too much. Very much in her, I still believe there is inherent good out there in the world, and sometimes when life really gets too tough. All you really need is love.

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My mother and I were browsing at MAC yesterday when I found a petrified, frozen looking Lianghui standing next to me. Really surprised to see her, I gave her an overwhelming greeting ( saying Hi really enthusiastically) and she looked even more fearful of me..haha it was quite funny, and then Rebecca came forward and sort of rescued the whole situation. Turns out that Lianghui couldn't remember my name and Rebecca said the poor girl was quite scared to call me. However, It was good to see the both of them, but it somehow felt alittle strange not seeing Shihui together with her sisters yesterday. Come back soon, my dear!

Mich: Have fun at Stockholm, do take interesting pictures and send some over! Also, I have not disappeared.See, I'm blogging more than usual!
Stella: Gd luck with the Thesis, Its gonna be over soon and we'll go out to celebrate your birthday!
Qingya: Hello, where are you, whats happening? Please blog!
Angie: How was your mom's birthday dinner? We missed you at the movies last night! Don't worry, we'll do it again soon.
Fanni: Thanks for accompanying me last night. Thank gdness we have each other to keep company with!

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Thursday, March 18, 2004

FOUR DAYS TO THESIS SUBMISSION gahhhhhhhh! *tears eyebrows off*

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I don't know if I should laugh at what a member said to me a few days ago:

I was in a lift with 2 other members of the club. As I was standing next to the "buttons" ( I forgot what those numbered things are called), one of the members asked me if I could help him press the button for Basement 3

Member: Hi, can you help me press B3 please?
Me: Yes of course
Member: Thank you very much. Well thats the furthest I will go, any more deeper I will be in hell.
Me: Errr ( weak smile)

See, these are the people I meet on a daily basis. Haha, I wonder how long my sanity will last. Not to mention I meet crazy children too.


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Wednesday, March 17, 2004

P.s (An aussie mate sent me this, I thought it was darn funny. )

+++++++++++++ WE ARE ONE +++++++++++++

We are the people of a free nation of blokes, sheilas and the
occasional wanker. We come from many lands (although a few too many of us come
from New Zealand), and although we live in the best country in the
world, we reserve the right to bitch and moan about it whenever we bloody
like. We are One Nation but divided into many States.

First, there's Victoria, named after a queen who didn't believe in
lesbians. Victoria is the realm of Mossimo turtlenecks, cafe latte, grand
final day, and big horse races. Its capital is Melbourne, whose chief
marketing pitch is that "it's liveable". At least that's what they think.
The rest of us think it is too bloody cold and wet.

Next, there's NSW, the realm of pastel shorts, macchiato with sugar,
thin books read quickly and millions of dancing queens. Its capital
Sydney has more queens than any other city in the world and is proud of it.
Its mascots are Bondi lifesavers that pull their Speedos up their
cracks to keep the left and right sides of their brains separate.

Down south we have Tasmania, a State based on the notion that the
family that bonks together stays together. In Tassie, everyone gets an extra
chromosome at conception. Maps of the State bring smiles to the
sternest faces. It holds the world record for a single mass shooting, which
the Yanks can't seem to beat no matter how often they try.

South Australia is the province of half-decent reds, a festival of
foreigners and bizarre axe murders. SA is the state of innovation. Where
else can you so effectively reuse country bank vaults and barrels as in
Snowtown, just out of Adelaide (also named after a queen). They had the
Grand Prix, but lost it when the views of Adelaide sent the Formula One
drivers to sleep at the wheel.

Western Australia is too far from anywhere to be relevant. It's main
claim to fame is that it doesn't have daylight saving because if it did,
all the men would get erections on the bus on the way to work. WA was
the last state to stop importing convicts and many of them still work
there in the government and business.

The Northern Territory is the red heart of our land. Outback plains,
sheep stations the size of Europe, kangaroos, Jackaroos, emus, Uluru, and
dusty kids with big smiles. It also has the highest beer consumption of
anywhere on the planet and its creek beds have the highest aluminium
content of anywhere too. Although the Territory is the centrepiece of our
national culture, few of us live there and the rest prefer to flyover
it on our way to Bali.

And there's Queensland. While any mention of God seems silly in a
document defining a nation of half arsed sceptics, it is worth noting that
God probably made Queensland, as its beautiful one day and perfect the
next. Why he filled it with dickheads remains a mystery.

Oh yes and there's Canberra. The less said the better.

We, the citizens of Oz, are united by Highways, whose treacherous
twists and turns kill more of us each year than murderers. We are united in
our lust for international recognition, so desperate for praise we leap
in joy when a rag tag gaggle of corrupt IOC officials tells us Sydney
is better than Beijing. We are united by a democracy so flawed that a
political party albeit a redneck gun toting one, can get a million votes
and still not win one seat in Federal Parliament.

Not that we're whingeing, we leave that to our Pommy immigrants.

We want to make "no worries mate" our national phrase, "she'll be right
mate" our national attitude and "Waltzing Matilda" our national anthem
(so what if it's about a sheep-stealing crim who commits suicide). We
love sport so much our newsreaders can read the death toll from a
sailing race and still tell us who's winning.

And we're the best in the world at all the sports that count, like
cricket, netball, rugby league and union, AFL, roo shooting, two up and
horse racing. We also have the biggest rock, the tastiest pies,and the
worst dressed Olympians in the known universe. Only in Australia can a
pizza delivery get to your house faster than an ambulance.
Only in Australia do we have bank doors wide open, no security guards, or cameras but chain the pens to the desk.

Stand proud Aussies - we shoot, we root, we vote. We are girt by sea
and pissed by lunchtime. Even though we might seem a racist, closed
minded, sports obsessed little people, at least we feel better for it.

I am, you are, we are Australian!

P.S We also shoot and eat the two animals that are on our National
Crest!!!! No other country has this distinction!

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Tuesday, March 16, 2004

hey girls, keep updating the blog alright? checking the blog is the first thing i do every morning nowadays and i really look forward to it.
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on the contrary, i was fully aware that those 2 years were the best times of my life then. i guess prob cos i was never really happy in sec sch, i was fully aware of how much happier i was when i got to jc. just flipped through our jc photo album and got a few things to add to the list for 98 and 99....

stella: guo fu chen (i've got photographic proof....hahhaa), the ant (with photographic proof as well)
gayle: dressing up, up, up, bottle
Shihui: how to hide from mr. ho, 'HotDate' ( i remember cheryl ho guessing what HD meant and she thought it was hong dou)
Angie: multiple ear holes, writing letters on nice paper.
Qingya: tube tops

do you guys every wonder, our lives feel so tiring and stressful compared to 5 yeras back. do u think it's gonna get worse. what's going to happen in 10 years? will things be worse and we'll wonder what the hell we were thinking and grumbling about in 2004? i often wonder if i would have gone crazy by then, working under stress and losing all my hair. no matter what, i really hope i still have every single one of you with me then.
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Monday, March 15, 2004

How did we get so old so fast
5 years ago our thought processes went like this (pls feel free to add on in future posts what you remember abt 1998):

mich: o-levels o-levels o-levels
angie: garz , kinokuniya stickers, wang lee hom, mambo, obsessing abt hair
g + stella: berries (fanni ask everyone what berries and garzes are ), guitar club , nicknames , messy hair
shihui: talking to wayne and chenho, trumpets, pre-rebonded hair
fanni: i dunno but pls tell me!!! all the icki details pls
qingya: sitting on high benches only, adoring looks from ruggers, getting bitchy messages on her motorola pager, high socks

now whats on our mind:
everyone: work, money, growing up, parents, past disappointments, unpleasant changes, guilt , stress, reality.

im sure we'll still live to see brilliance, true girlfriends for one, are blessings not everyone has. what i don't understand though is why we felt so troubled back then.....

it was probably the sweetest time of our lives.


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you girls are right. we are all getting so old.... it funny how our topics of conversations evolve over the years. we've got to the age, way past teenage arrogance to bring our parents out for dinner. i actually find it a real treat to spend time with gayle and angie's moms, might be due to my lack of one, i don't know, but they are really nice.

angie: wish your mom a belated happy birthday from me. wish i could have been there.

so stel, how did you feel in a wedding dress? did you start hyper-ventilating like carrie when she first put on her wedding gown? or were u more like charlotte?

fanni: i think you are working too hard, imagining everything to be advertising and PR. chill out, sista!

and to straighten upthe facts, i wouldn't consider that a honeymoon especially considering there were 3 of us and staying in a backpacker's dorm. plus the fact i could have died (details from g). but ignoring the last statement, yes, it was a good trip. got really close to his friend, Felicia. known her for 2 years and she never seemed too friendly before. but we got along fantastically while she was here and i was soooo sad when she left for s'pore. i kept asking her to extend her stay, but she was quite broke already. and the day after that, one of my 2 gfs here went back for good. leaving me to feel rather pathetic. of cos, share's here but she's got some personal problems and i haven;t even met up with her yet. i guess gabriel's around (though i don't think he'll look good in a skirt) and i haven't met up with him either. girls! pack yourselves into boxes and ship yourselves. i need a girlygang hug.

other than that, all's well, rushing through assignments and homework and bitching about my loser lecturers daily.

gayle: don't be too sad about amos, i'm sure he'll miss you too. he might be naughty but i'm sure he loves you. it was good while it lasted.

mich: be good and finish your work and go have a ball of a time!!!

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i told the girls alreadi, but jerri and mich i tried on my first wedding gown everrrrrrr!

me and friends were at salvtn army trying on gross ktv gowns when i saw a really beautiful dress.... it fit me within an inch of my life and it was all poufy princess tulle, the works! looking at myself in the mirror, i felt that i really look forward to getting married one day, even if that day is plenty days away from today.

you are right mich, we are getting so olddd, doing auntie things like trying on wedding gowns and perming our eyelashes. g dont hide, u are my partner in eyelash crime AHA.

also, i realize i am missing u girlss lots. havnt had a chance to talk properly with each of you for some time now. thks to fanni for doing a speed update on whats-what to me on sunday. if u guys r hanging out, just gimme a ring/text ya, i'll def try to come if i can!


ps: fanni SO looked like she was waiting for a blind date, she had flowers in her hand and was looking searchingly into the crowd (for me).

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Pic of one happy woman:

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Hello girls,
Nothing much to update this week, didn't do anything besides working, drinking and attending birthday parties during the weekend. I finally bid Amos farewell on sunday..hes going to another home that can provide better love and care ( I hope!) for him.
I just realised I've got so much work to do yet so little time.. The top of my agenda is packing- I'm moving in 2 weeks, and not a single thing in boxes yet! I also need to go shopping for a roomy wardrobe !
Angie and I were planning to go for a short trip during easter weekend, but i realised I might have to work during the weekend, so that leaves me out Tamadee
I promise to go somewhere in July, after my probation! Let me save some money first


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hi honies and bunnies
seems like everyone is having a fancy time!
im gooood...mugging essays once again! but it's not too bad this time round i hope! went downtown on sat to check out an exibition for my essay and i had such a nice time out! the weather was perfect and i got reminded by all the pastels bursting in the boutiques that spring is FINALLY here! wootwooot!
cant wait for easter break, ill be going to stockholm on the 21st(im really exicted cos MOMUS was just in sweden and he went to all these excellant museums i cant wait to visit)....that is IF I CAN finish my essays...will be there for 4 days.
will try to get downtown as much as possible toooo during easter..... it's soo diff from where i live and study. im moving from one ghetto to another all this while, yo!

shihui ur honeymoon sounds perfectttt

fanni, stella sendme pics of u girls for angies mum's bday..made me wanna cry...we are all growing old(whole idea of bringing parents out)! scaryscary now there is really no running away from it....but like i was telling stel, im sure we would all grow old and do grosss aunty stuff together except there is no way im going to tattoo my eyebrow...
(im thinking that G will prolly be the first..since she is the first to venture into ahem... waxing..... kwakwa!)

guru g! ure MIA!

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Sunday, March 14, 2004

Hello gals…

Definitely have to blog this entry. Angie gave us a big treat
at here last night. It was an early celebration for angie’s mum birthday. A surprise birthday party for her. Victor (angie’s bro, Stella and me) were inside the restaurant waiting for the birthday gal and accomplices to arrive(angie, gayle and her mum).

Angie’s mum face lighted up when we all shouted “Surprise” as she stepped in the room. She was really shocked, but I can tell she is very happy. Her face went blushing and gleaming with joy. Suddenly, it seems like all the girls undesirably-familiar feelings of boredom and ennui and restlessness that has permeated the past week had evaporated. The positive vibes just kicked in as we enjoyed the 8 course yummy dinner.

As me and Stel dint really know what to get for angie’s mum initially. So we decided to get her flowers. I’m so proud of Stella. You go girl!!!
Our dear Stel wasn’t late at all when I'd meet up with her. Imagine me standing in the Orchard train station control for only like 3 mins with a bouquet of pink carnations on a packed Sunday evening down town, only to see her in sight within 3 mins of designated meeting time. Boy! Am I excited that Stella arrived punctual ! I really give Stella a big big thumbs up. No. Take my two big Thumbs up!!! :D
P.s (According to stella, i looked like one who is waiting for my blind date to turn up whilst keeping a lookout for her.)

Hopefully, you girls will post the birthday pictures up for the rest to enjoy.

Jerri, when I was reading your post, i was imagining that you and ben would be like a romantic holiday get away ad, "row row, row your boat" that kinda scenario. The ending of the ad would sound "just had to be there" tagline to hold your hands. So sweet

lots of love,

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Wednesday, March 10, 2004

hi girls

i've been away for the past few days. one of ben's friends came to visit from s'pore and we all went up to coral bay and exmouth to see the ningaloo reef. it was quite far up and took us about 12 hours to drive up. i never thought i would take such a long road trip. but it was really cool. cos we drove so far up, the weather was different. it was hot and humid and there were lots of flies! yuck. we all looked and felt like carcasses with flies all over us.

we spent a whole day driving up from 6am to 6pm and stayed at a backpackers. the 2nd day we went snorkelling in the clear blue water to see the corals and reef fishes. they were so cute and beautiful!!! had a bit of drama snorkelling for the first time. *ask gayle for details* but after that was settled, everything was fine and i love snorkelling.

on the 3rd day, we drove further up north to exmouth and found ourselves a relatively secluded beach in a national park called turquoise beach and it was simply breathtaking. the white sand, crystal clear waters and cloudless sky. i found the shimmering of light on the water really hypnotic. the bay was unique because of the strange currents coming in sideways due to the reef and it was hilarious. you'll see us trying to swim as hard and fast as we can and yet see us not going anywhere at all cos the current keeps pushing you back and swimming simply keeps you at the same position. it was hilarious. plus, the girls didn't have flippers, making our kicking rather futile. ben had the only pair of flippers on cos they fit only him. we all felt so foolish. our equipment was incomplete. our friend had only a mask and no snorkel. and i had both. so she had a hard time breathing. while basking in the sun, we spotted a turtle and they went after him while i kept a lookout. they manage to see him and chased him until he dived down. i was quite disappointed i couldn't see the turtle. it was quite big. more than half a metre wide.

by the time we went back to coral bay where our lodgings are, it was late already and the kangaroos were about and we almost hit some. it was so strange seeing a kangaroo hopping away into the sunset. it was like watching a qantas advert.

finally on the 4th day, we left early in the morning to drive back to perth, stopping at kalbarri national park to see some coastal structures. beautiful but hard to enjoy them with hundreds of flies around us. had some trouble with traffic as well, with road trains kicking up such a sand storm i was literally driving blind, unable to see what was ahead of me. it the road train had braked, i wouldn't have known.

got backl really tired at 10.30pm. fully enjoyed the trip. even the drama seemed insignificant. all the beautiful cute little fishes, the big intimidating ones, the sunsets, sunrise, the beautiful beach, scenary along the road and fun times made it such a wonderful experience. wished we had taken more pictures though.
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Sunday, March 07, 2004

Hello lovlies..

Greetings on the Mar 8th aka (san ba).

Some eye candies for the start of the week.

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Thursday, March 04, 2004

Hammies on a hot day!

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Wednesday, March 03, 2004

hello all!

been workng non stop on my thesis in hall, my days are just a blur of typing and analyzing statistics!

perhaps its boredom at being cooped up in campus all day but i have a new crush whee! he's this polynesian guy with those afro type hair tied up. i think he super looks like gallen lo , that kind of stature and face (but with cute hair) and he's those brooding brooding types. david thinks he's quite handsome too, and so does my hostel friend who knows him vaguely. She told me he's from Mauritius--- how dreamy is that!

first spied him at international night bazaar in my hall the other day.. ah lemme digress and talk about international night... there was this big hair mad woman and her pinkshirt-clad partner teaching everyone weird international dances like chacha and that dance-where-everyone-lines-up-and-kicks-their-legs-out.. hahaaaaa! been noisy like getai the last 2 nights!

okok i hope no one who knows him reads this. i swear i'll just sink into the earth and die.


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Hello darlings!

Midweek update on my new job:

Got ticked off by Hr manager on first day regarding my attire...TAMADE, i was in pants and shirt, what more does she want? Turns out shes the ONLY one in the whole company anal about dressing. My editor saunters in and out in sneakers and tanktop can?

Well, everything has been quite alright so far. Not much to do yet, but I assume things will start kicking in from next week on wards. Not everyone is nice. I think the guys there are nicer.. The girls, especially those from my department are quite bitchy. I noticed them gossiping and giggling behind my back on the first day. AND NO, I'm not being sensitive..but to hell with them, it doesnt bother me as long as I get my work done.

Sorry girls, no cuties or hot hunks on the job, or even near the area. ALL old foggies or uninteresting men. TAKERS?

Alright, can't wait for the weekend to come. I want to watch BIG FISH! Alright, see the local crew on the weekend yes, no?

Qingya: I am glad u are feeling better now, got us worried for a bit! :)

Shihui: No i wouldnt dare jinx u..haha but I'm secretly happy that u are going to come back at the end of the year. I will get to see u more then!!! ANd yes, we should all take a short trip somewhere.......

Mich: Sorry havent been able to chat with you at night, I'm mostly asleep by 10 pm! getting old......:)

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Tuesday, March 02, 2004

A huge group hug to the girls.

Qingya: Sorry to hear about your pets. I'm sure the new pup will bring you guys good luck. Anyway, it’s nice to know you and your Danish boy after all the ho-hum are back in full swing.

Mich: No doubt, the uni life is going to be the best time in adulthood. Work hard, Play harder kay?

Jerri: We dint’t jinx you. It’s fate. Come back when you feel bored in OZ land. We miss you, and we are always here, your air-bags.

Angie: Looks like I cant be your lunch buddy already. Haven't heard from the folks at red-hill yet.

Gayle: How's SRC? update us. The gossips, the cuties the bitches etc...

Stella: So sorry that i can't go to the bowie concert on thursday. Dad's birthday. Please accept my sincere apologies... Hope you have a kick arse evening with bowie.

Personal chapter, I’ve been to a shortest interview in my life yesterday. It’s only 5mins. So short that it can be a record in Guinness world records.

Interviewer in his bad Singlish accent : Copywriter has to do this and that in our company.

Me: (Smiles and nods) Okay...

Interviewer: Do you have anything to show me?

Me: This is my book; please give me your comments on it.

Interviewer: Flips through hastily without even bother to read the contents. Just flipping.

Me: (Thinking in my heart): Ouch! Please be gentle with my stuff.

Interviewer: Okay, I’d call you again if you’re short listed.

Me: Sure, Thanks for your time (and walks out)

Still not given up hope in the quest for a job. I’m cultivating to be more a Teflon-like perseverance most of the time. A lot of things no longer bother me that much, especially things that I can't do anything about. And I'll just take control when it comes to things within my control.


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oh dear! why did all your pets die, qingya? were they all just old or like you speculated, poisoned? it's just so odd. when we went over, they all looked fine. it's so sad.

on the topic of your personal life, i'm glad things are better now. hope everything else is fine too.

hey mich! sounds like you are having the time of your life, sounds really fantastic! i wanna be there too

did you girls work some voodoo spell or jinx me or something? cos i been working on my PR application and it turns out, i can't apply till i graduate from my masters, or more like, it'll be a lot a lot easier then. so looks like i have to delay my application till next june, when i graduate, meaning i'm free to go back end of this year. at least for a week or 2, cos ben will be here all by himself. or we could all fly off somewhere together for a week or so. what do u think?

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