<$BlogRSDUrl$>

Tuesday, April 30, 2002

You are Fozzie!
Wokka Wokka! You love to make lame jokes. Your sense of humor might be a bit off, but you're a great friend and can always be counted on.
.



g
(0) comments
watched spiderman today and i thought the movie was ace!! the last super hero movie i *loved* so much had to be superman, back when we were still kids. i realize that marvel comics has one singular formula for superheros:

1) Must have no parents and thus live alone/with kindly aunt and uncle
2) Must work in the media industry (Newspapers, photography etc)
3) Must have skintight costume
4) Their girlfriends against all odds do NOT recognize that the superhero they love is the dorknextdoor that loves them
5) Must have word 'man' in their superhero names

This applies to spiderman=superman=batman! We are being scammed!

stel
(0) comments
im so sick of being mistaken as some old women........shite man! the next the i'm asked about my age i'll just blabber on about having menopause and how my 20 yr old kids are taking drugs and everyone will thus be shocked and jealous of how young i look....
m.
(0) comments

Monday, April 29, 2002

what a boring life i lead as well! My life only revolves around school, the gym and the supermarket opposite my hostel. Last weekend I went to the library and stayed at home to do work. How pathetic is that..I think my circle of friends have diminished so drastically that my phone has been quite silent..

oh, ta ma de, got another legal notice summoning me to pay some outstanding handphone bill..I think somone cursed me or I must be having retribution for making fun of people! Ok now I believe in bad karma and shall keep my mouth shut to avoid future misfortunes

oh qingya, don't worry, just enjoy the company and keep your options open..if he doesnt mind it , all the better, don't worry abt it too much for now..go with the flow of things..we will always love and support u!

g
(0) comments
Casting
Howard Nemerov

The waters deep, the waters dark,
Reflect the seekers, hide the sought,
Whether in water or in air to drown.
Between them curls the silver spark,
Barbed, baited, waiting, of a thought--
Which in the world is upside down,
The fish hook or the question mark?


I like this poem lots. It kinda says that everything in life is inherently ambiguous...how and why you seek meaning and form in your life maybe reflects on yourself as a person, your inner life and your beliefs i guess. For you, Qingya! There is no right answer, there is only how you choose to see the situation...

stel
(0) comments
gosh...what a BORING life i lead... it's so dreary and mundane....let's see...what did i do this weekend? i went to school for a meeting... got sick, stayed home and missed out 2 parties, went to school again on sunday and that's about it.....sigh...oh i did go fishing on friday night with the guys and they caught this disgusting octopus... it was grey and it looks old... like a granny octopus or something and it was just on the wharf slithering towards me and blinking at me, while one of the guys tried to kill it..... it was so sad... they brought it home and we just had it for dinner last night...wasn't really yummy...
(0) comments
i just realised the beauty and power of PR ( public relations) and i cannot survive for long being the tao-ass bitch i am *whine whine whine*
m.
(0) comments

Sunday, April 28, 2002

I think I have not been treating my relationship with Arthur right. I started seeing him again since the beginning of this semester for I've not seen him for abt 4 months since I broke up with him in the middle of last semester. Anyway, I've been seeing him a lot. I know I am not doing this right. Everytime we see each other, we make out. He kept asking me to get back with him and I kept saying no. So even though we always make out and seem so much like a couple, we are not officially together. I really think he's not my type of guy. I really like him as a person and as a friend. I even like him that way. But it's not enough. I don't know what I'm doing but 3 weeks ago, I told him we should stop seeing each other and he came and looked for me after my Italian class the next day. I know I am firm MENTALLY! But my body chooses to be defiant....heh. I am much more attached to him this semester and sometimes, I feel so strongly for him that I think it is love. He feels the same way...that's why he came to look for me after italian class. He said he can't stop seeing me. I am not playing with him for I care for him a lot and I kept reassuring him that. But I really enjoy my company with other guys and want to keep my options open. I know what I want, which is to not be with him romantically. But I don't know how I should go about doing it. I still like him though. And I think it's unfair to stop seeing him abruptly but I don't want to drag it any further. So what do u guys think I should do?
Qingya
(0) comments
went to some "indie" fleamart outside holland v today...supposedly selling a lot of old band tees and indie 2nd hand cds but i thought it was alot like the usual pasar malam, albeit food. oh..and miich...met jon there and he says your hair looks absolutely fine! Ok but he said my hair was alright as well and that he cannot believe we are vainer than him. hee hee. :> no more bad hair days for the sg girls.

oh, and i found some captain planet figurines at the mart..heheh. so uncool.

spent time reading a mill film reviews for my film exam this friday.crap. i can't remember the last time i spent my weekends idling.


stel
(0) comments
theres no more kick in getting high anymore cos depression always follows after the high..I hate that feeling..it is so miserable..

I think I am having a streak of badluck..lets see..lost 2 fifty dollar notes this month, kept losing my library photocopying card this semester..(this is the 3rd time this sem and it always happen when I top up quite a fair bit of money), and I just got this legal notice from this ex internet service provider that I am with..demanding that I pay them 150 bucks before they take appropriate legal action and "record my failure to pay as a default with credit reference services" god damn it!
AND

I scratched my bumper again..2nd time!
ok whats next?

g


(0) comments

Saturday, April 27, 2002

yo girls. today is the 2nd and last day of the Fresh Conference...i wasted money on lovely devil robots toys..and went after the speakers like star struck nsyn fans..yes it was gross but hey! we were all very happy bunnies after that.... one of our fav. designer wanted us to send him the pic we took we together him.....but i'm not gonna to do that cos i just look absolute shite in the picture! :P went to zouk after that.... i think this is probably the first time to zouk in 4 months... ! anyway i felt disgustingly depressed after getting a bit high..yeah so.....
(0) comments

Friday, April 26, 2002

i notice that on the eve of every single paper i suddenly get the feeling that the paper is going to be bloodcurdling and horrific! Serves me damn right for watching the two hour survivor special and the two hour amazing race 2 special today! FINE! I ALSO WATCHED DAYS OF OUR LIVES! In fact, i even CRIED through it. It were soooo very touching.

Now i feel megaaa guilty !

Dont worry mich..no need to run from flik flak...even if you stand still he will not be able to catch you because he moves so *..s...l...o..w..*. In fact, he might not be able to catch you even if you walked towards him...RAHA! Arg my mouth is so evil....It is all the stress corrupting my morals!Hope i have the energy to make it to zouk with mich tomorrow....I seriously need to destress and complaain.

stel
(0) comments
shihui...how come the css does not work?? u made changes to them,?!!??!
(0) comments
ive seen flick flack twice in a week already..... once during film fest and once during the Flash Conference i was attending today.....i just toally ignored him...cant really bother to hide from him....anyway girls i've been feeling very tired lately althought i'm really just rotting at home mostly...and to ans ur question gayle...uh yah it sounds like a good plan...maybe i'll go viist u girls in perth first and we can fly to sydney together or something.. i just want to get out of sg..and since japan seems like its not going to happen then aus will have to do..hehe...mr k have been calling me out..really regret giving him my no.
it seems like the past has really came back to haunt me!
m.
(0) comments

Thursday, April 25, 2002


Blank Joy by Rainer Maria Rilke.
She who did not come, wasn't she determined
nonetheless to organize and decorate my heart?
If we had to exist to become the one we love,
what would the heart have to create?

Lovely joy left blank, perhaps you are
the center of all my labors and my loves.
If I've wept for you so much, it's because
I preferred you among so many outlined joys.


My dearestttt qingya, im so glad you've resurfaced . So many things to tell you and in so many ways all our lives have changed.I shall write a long-ass post to satisfy you. How's things with you and art the russian roulette? The girls need the scoop, dear.How's things everyway else?I'm soooo glad you're coming here to sg, we will get together and you can teach me how to curse in italian...I do feel like cursing . And shaking my fist at the insurmountable pile of work i have, and shaking my fist at one irritating person i know . I am just amazed you are here in this blog..real! I am admiring your post like an astronaut admires a martian rock.

~fruity pebbles
(0) comments

Wednesday, April 24, 2002

Hmm...i think i am the only one posting long-ass messages. I shall stop doing that? Heh. Anyway, just to let u guys know that will be going back to Singapore around July for I'm taking 1 term of summer classes. Ciao!
Qingya
(0) comments
gayle! im really glad to hear that about your sis..i mean like *really* glad! see! happy stories still happen.tell her we are are really really glad for her..tell him to come to this blog to tallkk to us! i want the scoop! :)

hui> fruity? fruity as in cheekily-lusty? eee.

went to watch 'the pornographer'.it was totally suckass-boring! however the impressive fact remains that it was hardcore (er, as in real) porn but it still managed to press past the censors somehow. ok, and the projector at beach road broke down halfway and took 30 mins to repair so i was sitting in my tiny cramped airplane-seat grumbling the whole time.

stel
(0) comments
guess what? My sister is attached to this new decent christian guy. So glad that the other bastard is out of her life. I am so happy for her. I am sure my mom will be extra delighted.

School is ending in 5 weeks. hooray!

(0) comments
hey girls!! i came a cross this program which gives you a "bitch prison" name based on your real first and last name...you enter your REAL names and it spits out weird stuff...

I got: Stubby.....(huh?)
Stella: Fruity Pebbles
Mich: The Alter Boy
Qingya: Baby Buns
Gayle:.......(you dun wanna know)
(0) comments

Tuesday, April 23, 2002

Ciao...what's up girlies? I'm still venturing on this foreign land. Not too sure what the fuck is a blogger and why there's a separate blogspot website.Heh. What the hell, I'll just post some nonsense. I'm having this greyish clay mask on my face now and I'm sure it cracked when I was laughing at the comments u gals made with regards to my first message. Yes, I still live. But how? I know not.... Anyway, school's ending for me in like 3 weeks time. Can't wait. Where did the time go man? The temporal element seems to be as ephemeral as a rainbow. Who knows I'll be all old and wrinkled...that is if I get (or choose) to live that long....heh. Everything'd pretty ok here...I'm learning how to drive. Too bad the Americans learn on automatic...it's too BORING yo! I'm actually taking some lessons from Arthur on his stick-shift (manual) car, next to the few lessons I'm taking from this driving school>with a boring automatic car...Arthur's car is hot...but I've only driven on it like thrice...doing little roundabouts in huge, sterile parking lots in a random, haphazard fashion. I really want a stickshift but I'm pretty sure my dad will give a no-no. I shall REBEL! Anyway, I have to go wash my mask...it's way past drying time. Buona notte le ragazze (goodnight girls)!
Love,
Qingya aka Mermaid
(0) comments
wow we have new snazzy layout and we have been iconified into cute little heads.and our archives have been resurrected some more. terrific!

girls...my most bloodcurdling exam paper is tomorrow! it's a lot of history and economic/political theories on modern urbanization. it makes my head hurt a lot. :(

wish me luckkk... *lots* of luckkk..
hugggg meee...

stell :(
(0) comments

Monday, April 22, 2002

page is revamp in honour of QY and because i cant stand our previous ugly layout
graphic size is a wee bit huge for non broadband/cable/blahblah users cos im too lazy to slice it and deal w more tables...toobad!
blog spot is such a pain.....we should have our own domain!
shihui is there anyway to keep the right image contantly on the top? cos it tend to centralise once there is too much text on the left.
qingya it's so nice to see ur blog at last!!!! glad to know that ure doing all right!

ive an external crit tom....... i feel sick!
m.
(0) comments
Hey girlfriends, what's up?! Heh, shocks and surprises I'm certain....This is my virgin message after like eons...Mi dispiace. Anyway, life's been pretty weird...I'm pretty happy actually...LOVE my classes A LOT! But the melancholy is embedded too deep that I began to wonder if it's inherent and extractable. Binghamton's a boring but peaceful place I guess....the firmament lingers in hues of grey oftentimes. Weather has been so unpredictable here that we had to check the weather online ogni giorno (everyday)...Some things that I used to do or cherished have fallen into desuetude...but it's all good I guess. Anyway, gotta go. I shall return! Ciao le mie amiche!!
Miss u guys,
Qingya
(0) comments

Sunday, April 21, 2002

to gayle..a cheesy poetry peace-offering...

A True Friend by Khahlil Gibran

If I could catch a rainbow
I would do it just for you.
And share with you it's beauty
On the days you're feeling blue.

If I could build a mountain
You could call your very own.
A place to find serenity
A place to be alone.

If I could take your troubles
I would toss them in the sea.
But all these things I'm finding
are impossible for me,

I cannot build a mountain
Or catch a rainbow fair
But let me be...what I know best,
A friend that's always there
.

Tell me who disturb you..i kill them!!

~stel
(0) comments
Urgh feel braindead. Watched three filmfest films in 48 hrs including Apocalypse Now redux.(Which 3.5hrs long).The cinema was so small and cramped, i felt like i just got off a stiff flight to Iceland at the end of the last movie.To top my cake i am actually in the midst of mugging for my exams.(Which begin tomorrow).Momma..my brain is so full i think it's going to bust.

stel
(0) comments
i bought this book 'my little blue dress' thinking it's some inspiring memoirs of a female centenarian. but i know i was cheated after the first chapter and i only got to realise that it's written by a Bruno Maddox during the second chapter....what a fool i am!!!
m.
(0) comments
just toook it ....it's q. accurate to how i'm feeling right now....
colorgenics test

You feel worn out, physically and mentally. Recently the going has been tough and it looks as if there is still a considerable way for you to go before you can see the light at the end of the tunnel. If only you could put a protecting wall around yourself and cut yourself off from the rest of the world - be it even for only a little while - how wonderful it would be, but you can't - so you need to bear with it. Just when everything will seem at its lowest ebb you will find that there is a turnabout and your problems will seem to find a way of resolving themselves.

You are very self-sufficient and methodical. You presume to know where you are going but need to find a person who will recognise the way you are, not be too demanding and who is, as they say in Italy, 'Simpatico'.

Your confidence has been shattered. There are so many things that you would like to do with your life, so many dreams to be fulfilled - and you know that your hopes and dreams are not just figments of your imagination, they are real and you are looking for reassurance from someone. Basically your fears are such that you may be prevented in attaining your hopes and dreams. Even now you would like to broaden your fields of endeavour but in order to develop your 'inner- self' you need peace and solace. You are distressed by the fear that you may be prevented from attaining your goals. What you really need at this particular moment in time is quiet reassurance from someone close to you to restore your confidence.

You are an emotional, sincere and impressionable individual experiencing frustration and unnecessary stress. You are carried away by other people's enthusiasm and looking for that idealised relationship, be it in a business or personal situation, which you are able to share with a mutual depth of understanding. You have lowered your defences in the past and you have been hurt, so you are now extremely wary of being exploited. You are still ready to trust people on the condition that they are prepared to offer you proof of their sincerity.

You wish to safeguard yourself against criticism or conflict and to embed yourself in a protected situation. You are a difficult person to relate to and very difficult to please

m.

(0) comments

Saturday, April 20, 2002

ive been an awful person but sometimes i really feel i need to protect myself and from not hating the other party. i rather that he/she hates me. Is this evil and selfish!? sigh. Oh i bumped into the horse name F*** the other day and K**** person a week back... ahhh my past has came to haunt me!!! Horse name F*** is wearing some weird polo T and taichi shoes! I hope that means that he's either a taxi driver or some toilet cleaner.......
Otherwise i've been enjoying the typical lifestyle of leisure consisting of food, movies and shopping. Been watching alot of movies/ too many in a go. I can hardly remember any of what i seen and cant indulge in any after thought which is a pity cos i really love all the films i've seen lately....esp the oberhausen shorts.
i've to do another presentation for my project....what a pain!
m.
(0) comments

Friday, April 19, 2002

my mummmmyy....5am im still awake againnnnn

stel
(0) comments
Had major insomnia the past few days.....i actually was up the whole of two-days-ago staring bright-eyed at the ceiling. Got tired of waiting to sleep so at 8am packed my things and headed home from hall, thinking i'd catch more shuteye but i woke after a few hours! later that night i got panicked cos it was 5am and i still wasn't sleepy. Todau im wiped out!! Thank God. Haha so interesting eh..my sojourn of sleep. :>

On a more interesting note, i downloaded The Labryinth off someone! YAY! David Bowie and the Muppets! I love the song "Magic Dance" in the movie...Bowie sings with the muppets and somehow that is scandalously sexay. Hurhur. Must *resist* watching until after May 3rd and exams are over...

Eh guys, i am very disillusioned with perfumes now. Ambergris ( in stuff like Anai Anai) is made of dried sperm whale shit found bobbing in the sea/found washed up on beaches.. My book says " When fresh, it is black, greasy and maladorous. When dried, is grey and gives off a pleasant aroma." Erg...OK. That is sooo sick.

And smells like civet and musk are culled from scraping the groin areas of the civet cat and musk deer respectively!

stel
(0) comments
I feel human again..... the past few weeks(especially the last 3 days), i felt more like a machine than human... Was working on this huge assignment day and night... in my waking hours, i'm in front of the PC. in my sleep, i dream i'm in front of a PC. i could even see the error messages my program was giving me in my sleep!! Now it's all over...phew!

yesterday was a whole blur for me.... was up all night the night before till 8am..as people were goint to school, i was leaving came home to shower and with no sleep, back to school at 9am again for class.. that's not too bad... the worst part was that martin and i were getting tummyaches from eating the food in school...so in lecture, we were tired, sleepy and sick.

sigh..can't imagine the whole process is gonna repeat again next week


(0) comments

Wednesday, April 17, 2002

im feeling sad! this poem is sadder! :(

Again and again, however we know the landscape of love
and the little churchyard there, with its sorrowing names,
and the frighteningly silent abyss into which the others
fall: again and again the two of us walk out together
under the ancient trees, lie down again and again
among the flowers, face to face with the sky.


~Rainer Maria Rilke

stel ;(

(0) comments

Tuesday, April 16, 2002

ok my nightmare is close to an end......yipee!
today i had a panic attack ard 3 cos my bloody printer kept refusing to print out my notes for my presentation which is at 3.20. eh good thing i did some crap of a presentation on flash so i just read everything from screen..ahaha. crit went pretty alright...thank GOD!! i must really start doing something for god...like go to church. anyways we went to marche then balaclava and geylang for more food after crit...ok am not in a blogging moooood. so . there.
m.
(0) comments

Monday, April 15, 2002

gee ok..so the sg girls have bad haircuts and the aussie girls have bad tempers...

nmd when we get together again we will hire a whole bunch of hunky chipendales, pop the bubbly and enjoy..

mich and gayle: found you a boyfriend. share.



stel
(0) comments
shit i just wrote an entry and it disappeared...
m.
(0) comments

Sunday, April 14, 2002

mich: sorry i couldn't chat last night... i was in the midst of a project meeting....

the last few weeks have been so hectic for me with assignments and tests... almost all of it will be over soon... just 1 more assignment due this week, before 1 get a week's break and the next batch of assignments are due....sigh....life of a student really isn't easy. i've been having violent mood swings (due to the stress) that i keep picking fights with Ben.

Been meetin up with my group mates almost everyday. and while we're doing our project in the labs, they keep perving at girls....It's very amusing. they would be nudging each other when some girl walks past and totally loses focus when some pretty girl(or so they say...maybe my taste it just different) comes into the room. It's weird how the girls they tend to perv at looks like some slut or werido to me... i mean...hello??? heavy 5 inch thick makeup at 3 am in the morning? And they girls i think are pretty, they say too boring...what can i say?

finally got my well-deserved sleep last night cos i have no classes today. back to work now...
(0) comments
damnit.....got a headache and cannot sleep.

the girlygang's sg headquarters is plagued by bad haircuts. mich insists she looks male.and im kinda dorky cos my bangs are so short.
growwwwwwl. i dont care. as i told mich earlier, we can * pretend* we are too gorgeous for all bad haircuts and tt mich can pretend she is linda evangelista whilst i pretend that i purportly wanted to look individualistic. god damn it. feel like expounding theories abt why we should not conform to conventions of style n fashion and instead how we should go and do weird things to ourselves and rebel against uniformity but deep in my black heart i know i am just being vengeful n vindictive. wail. nmd. i have pretty hair pins.

oh something sooooo embarressing happened at the lib that day. i was balancing a huge pile of notes on one arm and trying to write something on the other and my whole stack of notes fell with a thud into this waste paper basket...... the librarian stifled his chuckles but this very rude girl with big glasses was howling with laughter. god damn it. i remember you, four-eyes. >:(

stel
(0) comments

Friday, April 12, 2002

Look what i've been studying for my bimbotic cosmetics module:

" Red, swollen, pus-filled lesions are called pustules. Acne Vulgaris is another term often used to refer to common, ordinary acne."

Pustules! Ha Ha!

stel
(0) comments

Thursday, April 11, 2002

* i feel so...strange*

ok my life is so different now...i am a girl in a whirl! It's like rollercoasters.Exhiliarating but sometimes i feel scared to the stomach. Anyway the dark PMS cloud has lifted somewhat. I realize my body is becoming very normal which is boring...i get predictable zits before my redsky, i plunge into PMS and i am even getting the redsky on a regular basis now. In the past my body was very radical...i would only grow no-reason zits on weird places like my knees..my period came whenever and my pms came after.

yay, going to watch a film at filmfest tommorow. respite from mugging for my exams which are horribly soon... mich i understand yr pain! i've been so worn out from churning out 7 essays that sometimes i fall asleep in the afternoons and wake up 5 hrs later..arg...

gayle cheer up... try one of the violent torture tricks i taught you on offending parties...

huihui> eat well darlink

my latest obsession: art photography by david lachapelle... beautiful-grotesque and interesting.i love pics of women. eeyru so perfert.heheh.





stel

(0) comments
last week was hell...no sleep for days and days and all i could eat was milo, biscuits and lumpy porridge cos i felt too dehydrated to take anything else...probably from feeling all jittery and nevrous. had this disgusting backache from sitting in front of the computer forever. plus all the running ard to buy materials and getting stuff printed....all the panic attacks i had worrying tt i wont meet the deadline...times i had to talk to myself in the toilet just to compose myself from all the stress...and indulging in simple things like bushing teeth just to take a break.......anyway it's all over and i was the happiest bunny in the world and went eating with my classmates from 2-7pm non stop yesterday at tamp. mall...first we went crystal jade(our tradition) then some bakery and breeks. and my classmate cant stop pointing out how terribly haggard i look and how dark my eye rings are...tsktsk...anyway today i got abit worried about my project....... discovered some big mistake in my cd-rom... i think i'm going to do badlyyyy so sad! i have this presentation on tues in front of 10 lects. how intimidating......but otherwise i am soo glad that i'm going to grad from this sucky lifestyle!!! felt like i can finally have my life back! and yep i was not late for submission! thank God!
m.

(0) comments

Sunday, April 07, 2002

Sentimentality and a cliché, but I still keep thinking of people and faces that have passed me by in all my life.

I ,like, think about how is it that some lives once knit so closely together suddenly take separate, solitary paths and how given time some best friends become such strangers. How the conviction of permanence in some things, we at some point, discover is illusory and impossible. Most of all, how very sad that in all our lifetimes we will have to go through the same situations and realization endlessly, repeatedly, although it is against our will.

I wonder if there is love that will be infinitely beautiful. Or even if it exists, I dare not be certain I am someone who is capable or deserving of it. But I refuse to regret the crazy choices I have made because despite everything, I still have big faith in some small things, like everyone should. Faith, will strength and courage to pursue a perfection in life even if one cannot have it in the end.


Helpch.. My pms is turning me into a soap opera writer.

stel
(0) comments
hi girls!im 21!

not much physical difference, except that i grew a huge zit on my cheek *just* before my party. had a nice time at phuture and in short, it was just a nice birthyday weekend for me.my toot (but kind) father bought me a bonia handbag...veeeeeryyy chic, i must say. hahah. NOT. anyway the receipt fell out and i saw that it cost some ...therefore when i go on holiday i promise to use it. thanks fellas, for your presents and your wishes. wish you were here!

stel
(0) comments

Friday, April 05, 2002

am about to die...almost!
-m
(0) comments
spent over 100 bucks on un necessary luxury goods

watched crappy queen of the damned..its terrible..but stuart townscend was cute

some fat bloke stepped on my foot and almost crushed my toes..god damn it

g


(0) comments
Happy Birthday Stella!

Hope u are drunk and merry.

g
(0) comments

Wednesday, April 03, 2002

girls...im shopped out! havnt gone shopping (reallllly!!) for a long time and am losing some steam .

anyways went to get my dad a bday pressie (for his bday is tm,one day before mine *hinthinthint* ehehe). i finally decided on a shiny blue tie to update his icky 70s-brown-polka-dots collection and then i went mad and bought too many things for myself...

am resolved to be bootiful and take lots of pics on my big day ! !
i'll be turning 21 the first!!
I must stop using exclamation marks!!

stel!

(0) comments

Tuesday, April 02, 2002

28th March 2001

darling, hold my hand.
I had such a bad dream of
thunder in my head
and rage in my soul.
the noise reduces me to a
child again, with tiny eyes
and trembling flesh.

darling, do you know it
tastes like blood
the broken things, the tears, the death of
hearts, bent
and compressed into a
cube.
that can no longer feel

how can i break
how can i help
how can i change

when i woke up it
wasn't just a dream

how can i leave
how can i stop
how can i help

when i woke up it
wasn't just a dream...

someone is screaming


stel
(0) comments
Sonnet xl

Loving you less than life, a little less
Than bitter-sweet upon a broken wall
Of brush-wood smoke in autumn, I confess
I cannot swear I love you not at all.

For there is that about you in this light_
A yellow darkness, sinister of rain_
Which suddenly recalls my stubborn sight
To dwell on you, and dwell on you again.

And I am made aware of many a week
I shall consume, remembering in what way
Your brown hair grows about your brow and cheek,
And what divine absurdities you say:

Till all the world, and I, and surely you,
Will know I love you, whether or not I do.


stel
stel
(0) comments

Monday, April 01, 2002

i've been having loads of weird dreams of late. and in my dreams i'm always away on some holiday...this time round, i went for this illegal gambling pakage tour to malaysia. we took yucky non-air-con bus there. very exciting!
and yes ive been sleeping alot..i'm essscaping from my project! ten more days to go!
m.iserable
(0) comments

This page is powered by Blogger. Isn't yours?


free hit counter